Thursday, October 03, 2013

Bloody Cable

The experience of my sudden operation is stuck on my head until now. Having my body in the hospital is indeed no different from having my body in the hotel. I really felt like a queen. At first I entered my room for the surgical preparation. I don't exactly understand why I must stay there four days before my surgery. My friends, families, haha, they were shocked too about my decision following doctor's suggestion. A very sudden decision. What on my mind was only one: that surgery sounds cool. And there it was the naive Jeki..

People worried. But I did not. At all. I was so enthusiastic about having the surgery. The days in the hospital were awesome. I got my own bed. My time for reading. My three-time-in-a-day meals. I got also sky! Sun rise every morning! Blue sky in the middle of the day! The cool darkness in the night! (my room was in 3rd floor, and my bed faced east, no wonder I was so happy in this room). Dahlia 1 room number 3. I will always remember the bed besides its windows. Damn, even I still remember the wind passing those square glasses!

And operation, for me, at first, was just like those challenges that I usually had faced (did I say I was so naive about this one?). And because of that, I was not that afraid of it. Nervous was only some hours before it took place. Just like common obstacles in my life, I guess. Now I remember Coelho ever said about fear, that just let what-you're-afraid-of be, and there will be no more fear. Experience is indeed, bringing us a huge courage. And buddy, it's only flesh that we're talking about. I've ever faced the death myself once. If I were about to die (again), then just let it be..

Yeah, sounds cool at first. But then.. the surgery..........

killed me.

Having those diseases inside your body means you look OK, but in fact you're so not. That one happened to me also. I went to the hospital as a "healthy"-look patient, and surrendered myself to them: I let the doctors incised me and make those incisions on my body. And tada! I then didn't have any "healthy" look anymore. And all of my first opinion about surgery was...... c r u m b l i n g  heavenly..... (parody detected)
Maybe I wasn't afraid of having the doctors slicing my body. But I never thought about the post-surgery thing. It hurts, buddy, it does hurt.. It's killing me..!!

And what hurts more is the fact that I can't do almost any of those cool sports such as mountaining, the one that I planned in this mid October, jogging is big no too, biking, swimming, ........... until three months later. God, save the queen Jeki.. Really, I never thought about the recovery thing. Those who will experience surgery, you guys should note that body recovery takes time. And the proverb is indeed always true: time heals. Oh..

Yet, this pain, as I said before, is just "the look". You know what? Although now my body feels the pain, I'm in fact, healthy. Healthier than before. At least..

Wait a sec, I really want to sing Coldplay's:
"I wanna live in a wooden house (not really, hospital is made of bricks anyway)
Where making more friends would be easy.. (better no friends there for some moments)
I wanna live where the sun goes out.. (yes! yes! I want it too!!)" (We Never Change)

Out from hospital, I got one big issue. That one was like my total-comfort zone. So comfort. So relaxed. I felt like I back to my mother's womb. And being out of there meant only one thing: got to be ready for the crazy world.. And one thing, instead of `Rumah Sakit`, RS should stand for `Rumah Sejahtera`. I'll be the first one who votes for it!!!

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enter what comes into your head.. -_-b