Wednesday, July 27, 2011


So I was in Yogyakarta for a few days, from about 5 days ago. I got a big surprise at Wednesday mid-night, a week ago. It was the news that my ex's Dad had passed away. He died 3 weeks ago or about 2 weeks before I went to Yogyakarta. At first, my decision (went to Yogyakarta) was made because of this reason: because I wanted to say *I'm sorry to hear that* directly. But then it turned out that the plan was cancelled. I went to Yogyakarta in such of a sudden, and I knew it wouldn't be right. Then yep, it is not right. When I do something in hurry, it always goes wrong. Hmm, it's one more lesson for me, that emotional things have an ability to camouflage the real condition and we will act emotionally that most of them are not good at all, and not good usually means not right. Oh, I did one more not right thing.. Bzzz...

What I regret is just that I missed my Mom's B'day, at last Sunday.. :'( Hukz, for the emotional reason, the sad one, I left the moment, the happy one. Hahaha, it was just not right, and I'm so sorry to hear that, Jek..:p

The other thing that I got in my last visit to Yogyakarta is well absolutely a trip. Trip is always awesome. When you travel, you move, and it's so good for yourself; inner and outer. It helps us to move our mind, to decide some solutions for the problems that occur on the road, and so on. It is so cool that our mind is refreshed. Moreover, I can write this post, Fellas..! Hahaha..

And absolutely best friends! I met Alvi that had came from Sweden and Ijah san, the co-assistance in dentistry faculty. They gave me so good welcome. My ex-boarding home friends too who gave me a bed to sleep and a place to watch Korean Drama in the afternoon (hahaha). I can guarantee that the first mission was not succeed. But I've done the most important mission, the mission that has no correlation with emotion. It was the mission that I'd planned long time before my last visit to Jogjakarta; it is *picking up my left behind items*. I got my Pollygon, my Spongebob, my lovely blanket, my sleeping bag, and more. No emotional is included except the goods that have so many memories on it.

And now that I'm on my personal spot inside my Mom's room, I said this words to myself, 'Welcome home.. And please learn more about your emotion that you can handle it and have the right decision of it..'

Oh! What an emotion!!
PS: I also got 'Madre', new Dee's book. I tried to find 'The History of a God', but then I met Madre. I think it was destined.. (Or, whatever..)

Saturday, July 09, 2011

Christmas Lights

I just feel so sorrow, then I chant this song, Christmas Lights from Coldplay, and I feel more sorrow.. Whad de..
Well, there's no correlation between my sorrow with the lyrics of the song, but the melody brings me to the tears.. Hahaha, it's so exaggerated!!

So, let's chant together.. (or cry together??:p)

Christmas night, another fight
Tears we cried, a flood
Got all kinds of poison in, poison in my blood
Took my feet to Oxford Street, trying to right a wrong
Just walk away those windows sing
But I can't believe she's gone
When you're still waiting for the snow to fall
It doesn't really feel like Christmas at all

Up above candles on air flicker
Oh they flicker and they flow
And I am up here holding on to all those chandeliers of hope
And like some drunken in this city
I go singing out of tune
Singing how I've always loved you, darling
And I always will

Oh when you're still waiting for the snow to fall
It doesn't really feel like Christmas at all
Still waiting for the snow to fall
It doesn't really feel like Christmas at all

Those Christmas lights
Light up the streets
Down where the sea and city meet
May all your troubles soon be gone
Oh Christmas lights, keep shining on

Those Christmas lights
Light up the streets
Maybe they'll bring her back to me
Then all my troubles will be gone
Oh Christmas lights, keep shining on


Oh Christmas lights
Light up the streets
Light up the fireworks in me
May all your troubles soon be gone
Those Christmas lights keep shining on

This Coldplay's song is so deep. It supposed to reignite the Xmas lights inside their heart.. Ah, I'm not christian, but I know how deep this song is. I know what Christmas is for them, which is now only a celebration. And Coldplay tries to bring back the meaning of it. Light up the streets, light up the fireworks in me, may all your troubles soon be gone, those Christmas lights keep shining on..

Hah, turns out it's completely unrelated at all!! Stupid tears, then awesome song, haishh.. Anyway, is there fireworks?? WoooW!!!